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you

Saturday, June 26, 2004

Someone's comment is still ringing in my head right now. I wonder why. Maybe cause it hits the right chord in my never ending problem that i've been experiencing. Issit possible that i've been lying to myself by being someone that i can never be. Still, being myself, i wonder how myself suppose to be. Wat is the real me? Be yourself. Does it mean being in a form or in a lifestyle that i can achieve or do things at its optimal level? or just a form where i can gain the most happiness? Guess the answer to this question isn't definite at all. Maybe it depends on how u want ur life to be. What kind of life i want? Am i suppose to know it now? Will i ever find the answer as to when i will know my destiny? or will i be damn to a life with no destiny? Issit possible for a life to continue with no purpose to hold on to? So much question yet still no answer. Only time will tell.

I wonder why people kept saying i'm being angsty and being depressing all the time. The word 'depress' means to be down and reallie2 sad. To feel complete remorse and a feeling of helplessness? Yet again, a word thought up by man is up to how a person defines it to be. Does my friends definition of 'depress' so shallow that as mere as being sad over something is already considered as being depressed? This question only be answered by them. Don't reallie wanna make any assumption.

Does talking about ur emotions and feelings reallie gives a dark and angsty image? Or the fact that its a topic so taboo as they could not comprehend it at that its too scary to probe on? I'm not gonna say that i'm unique as to venture into these kind of stuff. Just trying to figure out why these stuff are usuallie left out in our vast list of topics in conversations. Does a teenage conversation consists of things as schools, homeworks, shopping, sports and fashion style that the discussion of the human emotion seems alien? Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't. Maybe its a topic not easily comprehend by most teenagers. Maybe its something i should save it for later.

Heh, phew. That was hard to think up. Tried to refrain from assuming anything but well even if i do say i'm not assuming anything, some people will twist it in a deformed manner that it makes it look like i'm assuming stuff. So, don't bother twisting it around cause i'm not answering anything to it. Too bad. Comments which does makes sense to me are of course going to be read.

arfandi used up his time at 4:49 PM