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Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Hey guys, guess you should realised something happened to me, ok well not really, me, but to the things that I'm dependant on. Yes, my internet died, or got cut from me and my dependant family of 5. My dad forgot to pay, or I guess was delaying paying the bills for it. Close to a $156 due.

Feb 14, Valentine's Day. Or issit even that date? Pardon me, I have such a poor memory.
Some people are excited of this day, some people abhor it. Me, certainly am on a neutral ground.

Honestly speaking, I have never truly spent Valentines, what with people saying come on, you don't NEED to celebrate it and 'for what sak~' among the few. Ok fine fine, why do I even consider other people's opinion to make my own judgement.

Oh okay okay wait, I think I DID celebrate once! Ok, nevermind that didn't happen. Crap, so what have been your most memorable valentine's day anyway? The only person I actually gave a gift for Valentine's is my current girlfriend, thought she insist she doesn't want it. Though, I gave it to her nonetheless.

Ok, so that's it about the Valentines hoopla going around, what with the commotion starting a month earlier from the date.

arfandi used up his time at 2:43 PM

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Ok, I guess I didn't realise I haven't updated for a whole 10 straight days. Guess it goes by the days being extremely boring or extremely filled in between those periods. Though, for me it was more probably the latter.

Currently, I can't exactly recall what I did till I ignored this blog so much. Oh yeah, its because I was constantly having a sleep over at Rauff's and he doesn't have any internet access. That must be it. So since I'm already here, might as well I point out things that comes across my head currently. If you noticed, my english is considerably horrible right about now.

The 'Singaporean not getting enough music exposure' issue at Syazwan's tagboard has been doused down. Guess I did said a little too much, but I still meant what I said. What's with me and the top 100's? I don't know, I somehow grew up hating the top 100's. Figures.

Scarlet Soul is coming back, yearp you heard that right. Scarlet Soul minus Mahathir to be exact. Without you guys knowing, Sazali, Hafiz and I have been secretly practicing and conjuring up new songs without the lyrics yet of course. Frontman Farhan is coming back to join us soon after all loose ends has been tied up. Awaiting Hafiz to complete his exam as well before we officially start back to practice a demo that we're going to pursue with the help of Sazali's contact.

I'm currently as well doing a side project band with a couple of others, presumably to be able to perform at BE's dinner and dance. Yes, I know that I'm not a student in SP anymore, but somehow I'm allowed to perform there. Did I told you guys I got a $40 HMV voucher when I last performed at BE's talentime? Guess I didn't.

I realised I had a myspace account, so I guess anyone having such accounts might get themself known since I have quite a handful of friends currently. Ok fine, 5 friends. Hey, that shows quality alright. Quality vs Quantity.

So that should be it, a tying(?) of loose ends kind of update since there are alot of those in my blog. Thanks for reading, damn you must really have great patience reading through this.

arfandi used up his time at 12:25 AM

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Heads muddled up, fingers shaking irritably out of control, constant flow of annoying mucus down my nasal pasage. Yes, I'm terrible sick due to flu. Blame it on the cold, not cool weather, the constant rain and my weak defensive system. I already ate the medicine, drank loads of water, slept too much till my head hurts and stuffed a darn tissue up my nose.

Anyway, the previous post's issue has been cleared up, glad he/she came across it. It was a plain misunderstanding, though I'm pretty much relieved it was remedied.

Been indulging myself in Japanese drama of some places you guys should not know, yes I am that evil, but mainly due to someone telling me not to spread it to anyone else. Have completed watching Densha Otoko (Train Man), Dragon Zakura (Dragon Cherry Blossom) and urmz, I guess that should be it. Currently watching Nobuta Wo Produce. Note the weird names, but do not be mislead to think they're weak shows. They're quite exciting to watch as it shows a certain things in a completely different perspective that we usually look.

My nose is too stuffed up with mucus, can't think properly. Guess thats it for today's post.

arfandi used up his time at 11:56 PM

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Good afternoon people, and guess another post from me on a Tuesday noon as the weather is starting to turn for the better. Didn't realise that my previous post was 5 days ago, I must have dozed off a while to not realise it was quite far back. Guess something did triggered me to write one today.

What I expected yesterday when I logged in late at night was an offline message from someone saying he never requested me to go for that job at the carnival which I mentioned in a few posts ago. Before I get to that, we've seen countless of times people getting pissed off over something you posts on the net and fierce arguments ensued. So I'm assuming that these kind of 'friendly' exchange of colourful words due to what they have posted on the net are rather normal, though I still hate doing it. Usually I do not intend to initiate it, but I do know and acknowledge my mistake if people would point it out to me.

So back to the issue here, he was saying that he never requested for me to go for the job. Me being my usual memory lapse can't seem to remember when I mentioned saying he requested, so I just replied 'fine, you did not request. you offered and I simply accepted'. Sure that was extremely rude on my part, but come on, can't I at LEAST show my displeasure of someone suddenly saying something so abrupt? I didn't even replied with any obscene words, though I was so unimaginably trying not to. Though a few sentences after that, I couldn't help saying a few, just for the records.

Ok let me get this straight, I'm not one to be extremely pissed off over something like this cause everyone has their reasons behind blowing off their steam over me. I can try to understand that, even if you say I don't understand. Its so gawd damn typical to say, you don't understand in these kind of arguments cause come on, everyone uses it. I'm not angry at him for saying all those things he said to me on the conversation, but I am not ashame to swallow my pride to ask what exactly happened. I'm pretty sure my reaction to his first few sentences was rather immature but I realised my mistake and I'm sorry.

I don't really care about winning ya know. What is so darn fulfilling anyway, winning over an argument? In the end, even when you know you've made your stand, you're left empty and hollow. And what was the point in that? Fighting with your friend just so you can say I was right? I don't understand these kind of sentiment at all, and people can say I'm a goody-two-shoe, but I don't try to fake it and say yes I am. I know what are my flaws and I try to let people know that is what I am, and I try to change it.

Crap, this whole post was too emotionally drawn. I did not mention names here cause I don't want him/her to feel I'm trying to embarass him/her. Though, the least I would like to ask is to exactly specify where I went wrong and I'd like to make amendments to it. Being a guy, crap I hate this foolish pride that drives Man to madness. To give in to others, is not a total defeat but to gain a victory on another front. I don't like forcing points to others, but when I do, I'm sorry.

Well, thats about it. Didn't meant to go so angsty with you guys but I don't like fighting with a friend. You can say I shouldn't be too nice, but that's just me.

arfandi used up his time at 2:55 PM

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Oh remind me I got to ask my mum for concession fare. Sigh.

Anyway, seemed like schools has started, government school mostly and everything is back to normal. The hustle and bustle of kids running around, irritating. Kids running in trains treating the place like their own playground, I had the temptation to stick my legs out and see them flying to a pole.

Its the start of the new year, everything has started afresh, for those schooling anyway. Somehow I just realised how routine school was, but that routine was rather refreshing in a way that every year you look out for something new. Like every year has passed means you're much closer to finishing this phase of life. Though I hate hearing adults whine about kids should treasure the times they were in school and advice them to not try and grow up too fast. They'll say I wish I was young again, and what not.

I feel for them actually cause whatever that they say is somewhat true.

The 'treasure the times' part. Ok picture this, a student does one year of school and by next year they should expect something new to learn. During that duration you get to attempt stuff like sports, making new friends, going on field trips or just plain hanging out with friends. Every year you can expect changes and it makes you excited. The times you share with your friends are what makes everyday exciting and memorable. So lets fast forward to a few years after graduation. You wake up, lounge around for your work outfit, get into a train and work till its evening, go home, eat dinner, sleep. Repeat that with the numbers of days left till you retire.

Ok, fine that was rather exaggerated but thats simply it. The thing about working is that you don't learn anything new but apply the things that you learn, so it gets rather droning. There is no field trips, or sports, or anything other than well, the things you should do at your work. Though, don't be afraid of the work life though, I'm not trying to discourage them from doing so. Its just that, if we know that working is going to be like that, we'd better be prepared. Like find ways to make the working life more exciting, in ways that I'm still searching. There is so little people out there who enjoys what they do as a living, I want to find out those who finds excitement in the most boring job. That'll be a great scoop.

To those who are still schooling, sure get your priorities right, but do have fun and make memories with the people around you. Thats the only time you're able to do it and still feel ok about it. Those who are already working, I just hope you find happiness in doing your job, either make it more fun between colleagues or go for a job that is really something that you love. Don't effing care about the country needs people in this sector, bla bla bla. The whole country has alot of people, theres bound for someone to like whatever the country needs. For those who'd contribute themself for the country, be my guest. There is nothing wrong about being patriotic. Me? Theres only one life I'm living, so I'd rather make my life more fulfilling.

I know, most of my post are pointless, but I like pointing out things that I observe. When we always bury it in our heart, we may never truly understand it and we become ignorant. Though being ignorant is blissful, I'd still take the path of enlightenment.

arfandi used up his time at 4:08 PM

Monday, January 01, 2007

Alike?

Drawing done way back. Not recently, just realised my hairstyle is similar to the one I drew. Oh, yeah the drawing is of me, but back then my hair wasn't like that.

arfandi used up his time at 1:07 AM

Its 22 minutes past 12. Happy New Year.

Ok don't mind the non-celebratory mood. I don't really relish the fact that another year has just past, though a part of me was exhilarated. Why? 2006 has been a mixture of experience for me. ALOT.

I don't really remember the details to how I spent the whole year. I can divide it into 2 parts. The first half of the year and the second.

The first half, I got pretty involved in this job of mine which I'm on an indefinite hiatus for as far as I know. So nothing much to say that.

The second part was the one with alot of drama and revelations. I got kicked out of school and fell in love with my girlfriend on another whole level. Ok, fine fine, it isn't that much but now that you mentioned it, I realise how minimal my activities were. The got kicked out of school, damn, I don't want to remind you guys again what I went through. A couple of posts about how I was regretting, then a couple more about how I came into term with it and finally the moving on part. Nothing much. Ok but the emotional factor involved in the whole ordeal was very extensive. Emotions ranging from anger to shock to well finally relief. I know I should feel horrible but people keeps on saying that we should always learn from failures. Even from stupid ones. And what doesn't kill you, only make you stronger.

This part of course is the part where I finally realised how much she means to me. If you guys who have read the, well, this post way back, about how my girlfriend was thinking of letting me go. Guess I managed to had a talk with her a few days after that, came to understanding with each other. Though right after that, she approached me for this traffic count job which allowed me to be much closer to her since she's doing the job too. Ok bear with me here, its very corny for my usual readers since I always try to avoid being too emotional. Due to the job, I realised how much I have done for her, how close I was to giving up and how much I have grown as a person to be able to love her. Those close to me understands that my girlfriend doesn't go out on dates, or hold hands, nothing of that sort. Being with her really challenged me but somehow it was all worth the effort. Okok, I realised how much I really love her. Or more like I didn't know I could love someone this much.

2006, the year I turned 19, I got kicked out of school, I made new friends, I had a large pizza with Rauff under the block for my birthday, my girlfriend told me she loves me. Happy 1 year Anniversary dear. Yeah, its already been a year. You peeps didn't expect me to last this long right? Neither did i. Figures.

Haha, okok I'll stop at that. You guys won't see me this weak again. Since its the new year, I'm being rather sentimental.

arfandi used up his time at 12:22 AM

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